Thursday, May 19, 2011

It's been 352 days since...

I birthed a 7 pound 11 ounce bundle of everything sweet.

And as for me? I always wondered how my body would last birthing a child and gaining 42 glorious pounds. Lucky for me, the stretch marks have faded and thanks to my friends at Weight Wactchers I am currently 6 pounds under my pre-pregnancy weight. Let's not mention the pepperoni and jalapeno pizza I had last week m'kay?

I'm proud of myself and my body. I'm thrilled I don't look like I was mauled by a tiger. I give thanks to Mama Mio Tummy Rub Butter and Oil.

But now it's time to start putting the money away for that much needed boob job. You think I'm joking? Ask any mother who nursed a baby and didn't have breast implants to start with whether their boobs are different after nursing. Sweet Jesus...National Geographic comes to mind. It is the one part of pregnancy and motherhood that truly makes me self conscious now. I hate my boobs now.

I wouldn't trade nursing Courtney for those 7 months for anything. Sometimes I wonder if I had been a stay at home mom whether I could have nursed her for the whole first year (pumping is a bitch). I would have if I could. When the next bebe comes along, I plan to nurse as long as I can as well. But once we are done with kids I'm putting these tatas back where they belong and am taking a trip to NOLA to show them off. I kid. I kid. or do I? ;)

And now, as we head home to California for Courtney's birthday, I'll be tested by putting on a bathing suit and strutting my stuff around the Orange County beaches. Maybe I can be the next Real Housewife of Orange County? Oh wait...that would require a boob job. and blonde hair. Shit.


Ms. Christina said...

you are absolutely hilarious! Although, I can't relate about nursing, but I can say that working out hardcore these last 5 months have caused my boobs to decrease 1 cup size. not too thrilled to see them magically disappear in the next coming months =(

Sweet Craftikins said...

Ohhh I'm so happy to see this post. We think that same. I was the 1st in line at the doctors as soon as I stopped feeding Heidi. I don't regret on single thing and it has helped the confidence factor. I don't need to be a MILF just comfortable in my skin and feel like it's still MY skin not just a used vessel.
I am your #1 cheerleader Steph!! You will not regret it!